Aren’t little kiddies lovely? That Michael Jackson certainly thought so. But then again I always had a funny feeling about him. I don’t think he was quite as he seemed. To hear him talk, he had a nice attitude to kiddies. He thought that they were innocent, refreshing, open, honest, playful and generally a pleasure to be around. But you get the impression that he had some darker thoughts about them an’all. The filthy so and so. Besides. In general kiddies may be considered lovely. But there is always the exception that proves the rule. Every now and then you come across a vicious little bugger who would spit in your eye as soon as look at you and generally has no respect for their elders. Of course that’s not the natural state of kiddies. I blame the parents, pop music and ITV. If parents restricted kiddie’s access to pop music and ITV, then the world would be a much better place. I am convinced of it. If I was the prime minister I would invest heavily in the BBC and Easy Listening. In fact I will stick my neck out here and say that a Britain dominated by the BBC and Easy Listening would be admired around the world rather than being the laughing stock it is today. Any road. The kiddies in this picture come from an age before pop music, ITV, the BBC or Easy listening. They find their entertainment in nature and gentle play, smelling flowers, giving gifts, and generally being pleasant to one another. Of course, they are kiddies, and the world isn’t a paradise. gentle play, smelling flowers, giving gifts, and generally being pleasant to one another. Of course, they are kiddies, and the world isn’t a paradise. You can still see a bloke carrying a pikestaff or something in the background, walking towards a building which could easily be a prison tower. He is probably guarding some Michael Jackson type figure in there, both for his own safety and so that the kiddies can continue to play nicely without him disturbing them. In them days They wouldn’t have encouraged him by letting him release pop records and go on the ITV to play them to people. Ohh no. Although, in a chilling nod to the Peter Pan Prince of Pop, the little girl in the picture has a single white glove on her left hand. But perhaps I am reading too much into it. She might have just got some hot cakes out of the oven or something. Four things that you might do this week: (i) Do something nice for some kiddies. Buy them some sweets (sugar free of course). Make sure that their parents know what you are doing though. It’s a, crying shame, but people have some funny ideas these days and your intentions might be misinterpreted. I blame Pop music and ITV, myself. (ii) Listen to some easy listening. A bit of James Last or Klaus Wunderlich (the famous German cunnilinguist) or even Perry Como. You can’t go wrong. (iii) Take a tip from the kiddies and try and enjoy the simple pleasures of life. Go for a nature walk, pick some flowers, build a den, try and ride a bicycle whilst you are holding the front wheel a foot above the road surface. You will feel much better for it, Unless you fall off and smash your ruddy pelvis to smithereens. (iv) Bake some cakes. Cake mix is cheap nowadays, and you only need to add an egg and some flavouring. My favourite flavouring is Sherry!