Auntie Doris’s All Things Must Pass #1: The Beatles


“All Things Must Pass” was the name of an LP that that George Harrison did after the Beatles split up. He was probably glad when they split up, because they never used to pay any attention to him any road. He had already tried to get them to put half the songs on “All Things Must Pass” on Beatles LPs but John Lennon, and that bloke who had been pretending to be Paul McCartney since the real Paul McCartney died in a plane crash wouldn’t let him. So he became a hippie and recorded his own ruddy album with Eric Clapton, Bob Dylan, Phil Collins, and a few other of his pop mates. He had a picture on the front where he was sitting with four garden gnomes, which he thought looked like the Beatles, probably because of all the Hippie drugs that he had been taking since all of them had been to Africa to see Yogi Bear.
Of course, being in the Beatles had affected all of the Fab Four in different ways, and the other two, George Best and Peter Sutcliffe. Neither of them was ever the same again. Like I said, Paul McCartney died in 1966, and John Lennon, gradually became a self styled Messiah who talked through his nose all the time. Ringo Starr became increasingly obsessed with the idea of steam trains with human faces, enormous eyes and Merseyside accents. No wonder the sessions for “Abbey Road” and “Let it Be” were absolute ruddy chaos and they all hated each other by the time they got around to doing that pop concert up on the roof with the Drifters.
George Harrison was always known as the quiet Beatle, and he probably was the first to know that the whole thing was going belly up. What with his spiritual insights and that he must have realised that you can’t be a pop star forever, never mind what ruddy Cliff Richards says. The Beatles probably hadn’t actually been proper pop stars since thay grew out them ruddy basin cuts and ditched the collarless suits. It was only a matter of time after that, they were basically just messing around doing half the tracks on their LPs backwards, wearing multi coloured trouser suits and not shaving properly.
And what happened after they did split up? All of them did one or two records that some people liked. The McCartney impersonator formed a group called “Those Clever Wings” and went on to design sanitary towels with them. Lennon made some ruddy weird LPs with his Chinese girlfriend, and the Ringo did the “Thomas the Tank Engine” voice on the television. They were yesterday’s men.
These days they are all but forgotten as new pop stars have risen to take their place. Bands like Union J, One Direction and Slipnot, or pop singers like Justin Bieber, Matt Cardle, and Bonio out of U2. Acts like these will all have their brief moments of glory and then fade into obscurity alongside acts like David Bowie and Placido Domingo. Ahh well. All things must pass.

2 thoughts on “Auntie Doris’s All Things Must Pass #1: The Beatles

  1. They all moved on…today they would probably do a one member retro thing like CCR or Herman’s Hermits starring Herman Peter Moone. With there Zimmers , it would be just sad. All things must pass is a wisdom.Great post, Auntie.

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