Auntie Doris in the 21st Century #8: Austerity

Auntie Doris in the 21st Century #8: Austerity
It’s not good, being in debt. I always tried to avoid it myself. I never liked the idea of buying furniture on the Hire Purchase, or the never never as my Raymond called it. I wouldn’t let him do it. If you can’t ruddy well afford it, make do with what you’ve got, I used to say. We were lucky, I suppose, because he had his work on the buses, and whenever something new came out, such as colour televisions and stereo radiograms and such, his brother Cyril could get it for us wholesale. Of course there’s loads more new stuff being invented these days, what with the computerised eye phones, and DVD flat screen television super wuffers and what nots. So hardly anybody can afford anything and everybody is up to their eyeballs in debt, just to keep up with the Joneses.
And then that oily Cameron comes in and says that the whole country is in debt and that we are “all in it together” despite the fact that it was his greedy sodding mates in the banks that got us there. And his other greedy sodding mates in the financial markets, whatever financial markets are when they are all at home. I only understand the common market, where they do fruit and vegetables, and wet fish. Any road. “We’re all in it together,”he says so everyone has to suffer with this austerity lark. Although some people have to suffer it a bit more than others, as far as I can see. But isn’t that always the case with the ruddy Tories?
It’s the usual story, only worse, because Thatcher and her cronies sold off most of the country’s assets the last time around, so Cameron didn’t even have that to fall back on, apart from selling the Royal Mail to his mates for a fraction of what it was ruddy worth, now he has to do his penny pinching by closing down museums and art galleries and libraries and community centres and other places where people without a load of money can go to extend themselves. And closing down hospital wards and fire stations and cutting back on money spent on policemen and social workers and doctors and nurses and other people and things things that people go to in times of need. And his ruddy lot with private insurance and money coming out of their ears aren’t ruddy bothered. And all them Daily Mail readers are only bothered because they are having to go food shopping at Aldi instead of Marks and Spencers. That’s not all being in it together when other people are having to use food banks. We might have been “all in it together” in the war with ruddy Hitler breathing down our necks, so I believed it when Churchill said it, Tory or not. But I don’t believe a word that Cameron says, he’s only in it for his ruddy self. And don’t let anybody tell you otherwise.

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