Doris’s Digest #11: Why There’s No Time Like the Present

image There’s no time like the present if you want to get something done. As long as that something isn’t hanging your washing out to dry and at present it happens to be raining cats and dogs outside. Thats the trouble with adages like them though. You can always think up an exception, and before you know where you are, you are sat looking at a pile of damp washing, thinking that there would be no time like the present, apart from the fact that it looks like it might rain. If you aren’t careful, the present will never be the right time for something, because there will always be some excuse; Rain, Lumbago, “Loose Women” on the television, Having to be in the house so you can hear if the postman comes over with that ruddy parcel from the catalogue, and so on and so forth. The only limit to thinking up excuses is the limit of your imagination.
But there really is no time like the present. It is the moment in which we all live. If you are ever going to get anything done, you will have to do it in the present. In the future, you might tell people that you did it in the past, but when you actually did it, it was the present. And if you put something off until the future, by the time you get around to doing it, it will be the present. There really is no escaping from the fact that there is no time like the present.
Or is there? Some boffins claim that time is an artificial construct which our minds have created. If we didn’t have the concept of time, we wouldn’t be able to make head nor tail of anything that was going on around us. The boffins reckon that space is the same, we have just made it up, because otherwise we wouldn’t be able to operate in reality. In fact everything we see, do, hear, think, smell, taste or whatever, is just a product of our minds, which helps us to make since of the jumbled, mixed up chaos of the universe around us. It’s all an illusion. But even so. Even if it is an illusion and everything exists simulataneously, outside of space and time, there’s still no time like the present. Because that’s when it is. I think.
Any road, there’s not much point in using the old “Time is an illusion” routine when you are supposed to be hanging the washing out. Einstein tried that on with his second wife, Elsa, and she refuted his theory at once, with a good hard clout around the ear. He then spent the rest of his life trying to prove that he was right.
Doris’s Digest Frivolous Footnote
Einstein’s wife was also his cousin. Her mother was both Einstein’s Aunt and his Mother in Law. She was called Fanny Einstein, and if you are the sort of person who thinks that that is something to giggle about, then you will love the fact that before she got married, she gloried in the name of Fanny Koch!

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