My Raymond used to say that I was a Saggitarius. Cheeky so and so. He actually said I was a “saggy titty arse”. Well I could have had plenty to say about his saggy bits if I had had a mind to. And it wouldn’t have just been his titties either. Although they were big and saggy enough, I can tell you. He would have looked better in a bra. Or at least it would have lifted them off his belly and stopped him getting those horrible sores underneath. Anyway.. If you are a Sagitarian, it’s about time you started looking after yourself a bit better in my opinion. It wouldn’t hurt to put a comb through your hair every now and again, would it? Or at least it wouldn’t once you had sorted all the matted bits out. And learn to stand up straight. I know that slouching about is supposed to be all the rage these days, but it doesn’t do your ruddy back any good. You never caught my Raymond slouching.. Or at least not until his bosoms got so big that they weighed his chest down and gave him a permanent stoop. Still, at least they gave him something to fiddle with of an evening. Saved him messing about with mine. I don’t hold with this “motorboating” malarky. Famous Saggitarians: Ken Dodd, Albert Einstein, Jimi Hendrix, Barbara Woodhouse, Catweazle.